Frankenstein: Revised and Made Worse
by Antigone Chaucer of Kells
Summary: Dr. Frankenstein's diaries from the beginning to the end and then back to the beginning again.... and if there's time, to the end once more. You don't need to have seen or read Frankenstein. Follow the highlighted title.. to strange randomness.
1. In The Beginning There Was An Idiot

A/N: when there are hyphens between words that means they've been crossed out.

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Frankenstein – Revised and Made Worse.  
  
DOCTOR Frankenstein's Diaries (hee hee, stupid name.....awwww I made myself feel sad)  
  
Day 1 1818..... Watch has stopped  
MY class  
Left gas on for all to enjoy.... Now they're all high! Ha ha my master plan!  
  
Day 2   
On train from N.Y. to Transylvania  
Annoying couple having stupid conversation, am going over to punch, kick and eventually steal their vital organs.  
  
Day 3  
Station  
Train took too long, must invent time machine. (Master plan)  
Met lady and man people and got them to bend over.... Hee hee shiny boot meets ass parts 1&2  
  
Day 4   
Horror stories so annoying  
Blood: all over the place  
Fog: all over the place  
Buxom Wenches: all over your face  
  
Day 5   
Drew pretty drawing of food  
  
Later… Night..  
Annoying violin playing in -labra-, -lebratary-, people cutting place, went down and socked musician in the eye.  
  
Day 6  
-Mourning-, -morneing- Day  
Found Grandfather's book. Didn't read it but got the gist of it.

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That's all for now, if I get good reviews I'll write more, If I don't   
I'll throw myself off the face of the earth and if I'm going down I'm taking everybody with me!  
  
PLEASE REVIEW! DO IT! DOOO IT! It's right there! Click and type!


	2. The Fourth Last Act of Desperation

Chapter 2: The Fourth Last Act of Desperation  
  
A/N: spot the Monty Python reference!  
  
Day 7  
  
Went to graveyard and took all of the pretty peoples body parts. Ugly people make me wet myself.  
  
Day 8  
  
Oh god..... my monster has boobs..... will get man slave to remove them (and get him to bend over).  
  
Day 9  
  
Went to family reunion, during which Aunt Agatha came, got increasingly drunk and  
  
made her exit by jousting with tennis racquets with various unsuspecting people.  
  
How she got one that far up cousin Caroline I don't know.  
  
Day 10  
  
Am trying to think of ways to cover up the "accidental" incident with Uncle John who,  
  
despite being trodden on by horses, squashed and mangled like a bug that knew too much  
  
and poked in the eye and balls with a very sharp stick, still managed to scrape enough entrails of  
  
himself off of the road to have me executed or at least make me his personal make-up artist..... (maybe  
  
I can offer him something)  
  
Day 11  
  
Apparently there is something I can offer, but Uncle John wouldn't tell me what.  
  
I sensed it had something to do with a banana but he also said something about peaches....He might  
  
want some sort of Cocktail.....  
  
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Just a few Thank you's  
  
Logging in is not compulsary: Thanks hannah! you never fail when it comes to reviews.  
  
Jebus: Thanks a million! I didn't even ask you to review but you did it anyway! Thanks!  
  
Arsinoe Selene: THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH!!!! You were my first review on this story that didn't come from someone I knew! 


	3. Bigger, Longer and Now With Less Verbs!

Chapter 3: Bigger, Longer and Now With Less Verbs!  
  
WARNING: Randomness and desperation ahead!   
  
A/N: Due to the unexpected success of this fic I've decided to keep it   
going...  
  
(I've completely lost the plot... I think I left it under the sink...)  
  
OTHER WARNING: IF YOU LOVE FERRETS STOP READING NOW.  
  
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Day 12  
Uncle John stole my creation!  
  
Day 13  
Uncle John snuffed it whilst carrying my creation away last night, found   
him when I came out to get the milk. Have decided to keep him in the   
blooper room along with that cockney git who's kidneys saw a pretty   
ugly end and the Russian bloke who stepped in something with his head.  
  
Day 14  
Town Folkspeople had a meeting without me! I feel so left out...   
Apparently the basement violinist was there...  
Note to self: sock the basement violinist in the other eye.  
  
Day 15  
Maybe some kind of retaliation would show them who's who, who's the   
guy with the silly hat and who's the guy who isn't the guy with the silly   
hat. Maybe I'll wait until it's absolutely necessary...  
  
}}} INTERMISSION {{{  
  
Day 18  
Alright, this is it! I've threatened them with this for years and they said   
I'd never pull it off! They've taken this too far, so now it's time for   
WWF! (World War Ferret)   
  
Day 19  
Have recruited the ferrets and given them their weapons. Have decided to   
give the missile launchers to the bigger groups, as many singular ferrets   
have been squished.   
  
Day 21  
Have begun the kicking of the ferrets. A ceremonial event which dates   
back to yesterday, when I was walking with a one Mr. Van Helsing and a   
ferret unfortunately ran out of a bush at the precise moment I told   
him his movie was utter crap...  
  
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Okay now please review! I know promise to give a review  
  
A/N: And Now For the Thank yous...  
  
Night's Darkness: Hi Ciara! Thanks a million! I knew I could trust you to be a good minion and review...   
I promise to review you're next update/fic, but you have to actually update... (!)  
  
Celtic Babe/Elven Bride: My god... You're so loyal! The promise to review your stories aswell!  
  
Anne Blair: Thank You! You're Ophelia fic was excellent!  
Yeah, I was originally going to do this as a direct parody of the book but then I saw the  
movie "Young Frankenstein" and couldn't decide, so I just decided to parody the character and take it from there... 


End file.
